The Art of Parenting a Concussed, Sassy 11-Year-Old

The Wall, the Laugh, the “I’m Fine”

On Monday, Lulu was sitting in reading class, goofing off with a friend, when she threw her head back laughing and smacked the back of her head on the cinderblock wall wall behind her.

She came home cheerful and matter-of-fact, gave me the rundown, and because she seemed okay, we went with the classic “we’ll keep an eye on it” plan that every parent uses when something seems minor but also…not.

Later that evening she had cheerleading pictures, and my ex took her. Her head was already hurting, but in true Lulu fashion, she chose that moment to do long tumbling passes anyway because, of course, why not?

From “Just a Headache” to a Concussion

By the time she got home after pictures, she was really complaining about her head, so I handed over some Tylenol and hoped that rest would help.

Tuesday morning told a different story: she was super drowsy, and it hurt too much to move her eyes, which is not on the list of things you want to hear before coffee.

We were at the pediatrician’s office by 9 a.m., and sure enough, concussion. Apparently, sleepiness, headache, and eye pain are all very typical symptoms, especially in elementary-age kids.

Little Miss Know-It-All

This is not Lulu’s first concussion, because cheerleading, so there’s already a protocol and a whole plan for easing back into activity and screens and schoolwork.

The difference now is that at the wise age of eleven, she is absolutely convinced she knows more than me and the nurse practitioner, and getting her to take “rest your brain” seriously feels like trying to negotiate with a little, red-headed union boss.

The irony is that kids are supposed to do some gentle activity a day or two after a concussion, but Lulu would prefer to skip directly to full-send tumbling and endless scrolling, which is…not what the medical literature has in mind.

Sass, Development, and Blended-Family Math

Her newfound sassiness is, annoyingly, exactly what all the “tween behavior” experts say is developmentally appropriate; this is the age where kids experiment with talking back, pushing boundaries, and trying on a little attitude to feel powerful.

The catch in a blended family is that parenting styles and expectations aren’t identical across households, so the kids are constantly doing behavioral math: “What flies here? What doesn’t? Who actually enforces what?”

Cash and his ex parent differently than I do, and while our expectations at home are aligned, we can’t control what happens in the other houses, which means the kids live in slightly different worlds and the discrepancies show up most when someone is already tired, hurt, or hormonal.

Hoping for a Weekend Truce

So here we are: one concussed cheerleader, one tired mom, and one very sassy tween brain that wants to heal on its own terms.

Lulu’s attitude may be right on schedule for her age, but that doesn’t make it less aggravating when it collides with medical instructions, school, and basic safety.

My hope is that this weekend I can metaphorically arm wrestle her into actual rest, meaning less scrolling, more naps, and some much needed quiet time. And maybe, if the stars align, we will come out on the other side with my sanity and her brain more intact.